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1、哗鬼学院事情要从几天前说起Itallbeganacoupleofdaysago,还是昨天?orwasityesterday?好像过了很久Itseemslikeaneternity.典型美国校园的典型春日AtypicalspringdayonatypicalAmericancampus拉瓦托尔学院1.avatoireCollege,并非完全典型wellnotentirelytypical,这毕竟是“猪日”的前一天thiswasafterallthedaybeforeHogDay一些学生已经开始疯狂andsomeofthestudentshadalreadystartedtogocrazy.我不知
2、道这对我来说有多疯狂1.ittledidIknowhowcrazyitwouldgetforme.也是捐赠日的前一天Itwasalsothedaybeforeendowmentday.那是格里姆肖校长ThatsPresidentGrimshaw正在宣布新的建筑项目announcingthenewbuildingproject旁边是他的连襟,也是承包商withhisbrotherinlaw,thecontractor.某位玛德琳埃洛伊丝拉瓦托瓦尔AcertainMadelineEloiseLavatoire,创始人唯一在世的后人theonlylivingdescendantofthefounde
3、r第二天就飞过来付款wasflyinginthenextdaytopickupthetab.某个来自法国的老太婆人们这么说SomeoldbabefromFrance,orsotheysaid,各位淡定还没开始easyfellows,notyet.但我的故事就从那天晚上开始Butmystorybeginsthatnight我莫名其妙地来到了校长办公室Isomehowfoundmyselfinthepresidentsoffice为了重要的课外活动workinglateon工作到很晚importantextracurricularactivities.对就是我比利巴特森Yeah,thatsme,B
4、illyBatson,“一意孤行先生Mr.Onetrackmind.女孩是朱迪海托尔ThegirlisJudyHightower,学生会皇后和全优生sororityqueenandstraightAstudent.如果她看起来有点紧张Ifsheseemsalittlenervous,她有很多心事shesgotalotonhermind.明天是大型捐赠仪式Tomorrowisthebigendowmentceremony她负责安排andshesinchargeofthearrangements.我告诉她我会帮她的Itoldherdhelpherout.嘿我就是这样的人Hey,thatstheki
5、ndofguyIam.那么舒服吗So,comfortable?尽可能舒适WellascomfortableasIcanbe考虑到我们不应该consideringwe,renotsupposedtobe下班后在格里姆肖校长的办公室inPresidentGrimshawsofficeafterhours.你不记得格里姆肖说过什么吗DontyourememberwhatGrimshawsaid?”面向所有拉瓦托尔学院的学生Thedoortothisofficeisalwaysopen办公室的大门永远敞开着”toanystudentofLavatoireCollege.他没说他本人一定要在这里Hedi
6、dntsayhehadtobehere.他也没说你应该贿赂看门人Andhedidntsaythatyoushouldbribethejanitor让你进来toletyouinifhewasnt别紧张Dontbenervous,我们是这栋楼里仅有的两个灵魂weretheonlytwosoulsinthebuilding.是啊如果有人来了Yeahandifsomeonedoescomein,我们可以说因为我们要加班wecanjusttellthemthatwe,reworkinglate,为捐赠委员会工作到很晚不是吗workingfortheEndowmentCommittee,cantwe?没错
7、Thatsright他们会说“这就是学校精神”andtheyllsay,That,sschoolspirit.他们不必知道我们根本没有工作Theydonthavetoknowthatwewerentworkingatall.我一直期待着与你独处vebeenlookingforwardtobeingalonewithyou.我已经等了好几个月了vebeenwaitingmonthsforthis.我们可能再也没有这样的机会了Wemayneverhavethischanceagain.比利不是那里好痒Billy,notthere,thattickles.也许我们应该工作Maybeweshouldw
8、ork.朱迪还有什么可做的?Judy,whatstherelefttodo?你把一切都准备得非常好Youvedoneafantasticjobgettingeverythingready,皆大欢喜everybody,shappy.格里姆肖校长很高兴PresidentGrimshawshappy,你开心我就开心yourehappy,Imhappy.我太高兴了msohappy.比利停下听我说Billy,stop,listen,我不想让你把这件事放在心上nowIdontwantyoutotakethispersonally但是与名声如此之差的人butanykindofarelationshipnow
9、在一起的任何关系withsomeonewhohassuchabadreputation可能真的是灾难性的couldreallybedisastrous.哦不我不会在平Ohno,dsurvive.我说的是我自己mtalkingaboutme.我不能冒这么大的风险Ijustcantrisksomuchatstake,我的奖学金、所有的推荐信和法学院myfellowshipandalltherecommendationsandlawschool.我是说你是个聪明人比利Imeanyoureanintelligentguy,Billy,如果情况有所不同andmaybeifthingswerediffer
10、ent但如果有人看到我现在的样子我会失去一切butifanybodycouldseemerightnowdloseeverything.所以也许我该趁着还有时间赶紧离开SomaybeIjustbetterleavewhilethere,sstilltime.有的是时间Theresplentyoftime.比利等等Billy,wait.什么事?Yes?你有那东西吗Doyouhaveathing?是的我有那东西Yes,Ihaveathing.不是指那个是别的东西Nonotthatthing,theotherthing.还有什么东西?Whatotherthing?你懂的保护措施Youknow,pro
11、tection?套子?Arubber?我有套子吗DoIhavearubber?当然没有Ofcoursenot.如果我现在Whatwouldyouthink从口袋里掏出一个套套你会怎么想?ifIpulledarubberoutofmypocketrightnow?你会以为我是看在上帝的份上勾引你YoudthinkIwastryingtoseduceyouforChristssake而不是抓住这个载难逢的机会insteadofthisspontaneous,onceinalifetimeopportunity两个人不可抗拒地相互吸引forabeautifulandgenuineexperience
12、共同获得sharedbytwopeople美丽而真实的体验irresistiblyattractedtoeachother.不我不是这个意思No,that,snotwhatImeant.我只是想也许你会有一个Ijust,Ithoughtmaybeyoumighthaveone.我们必须有所保护Wehavetohavesomething.嗯出事的几率是如此之小Well,theoddsagainstanythinghappeningaresogreat,这需要奇迹itdtakeamiracle.对不起比利但是没门msorry,Billy,buttheresnoway.格里姆肖一定会有Grimsha
13、wsgottahaveone.也许改天吧Maybesomeothertime.我马上回来药店还开着呢llberightback,thedrugstoresstillopen.太晚了他们关门了Itstoolate,they1reclosed.我还能想到一个地方拿着这个Icanthinkofoneotherplace,nursethis.我十分钟后回来想着我llbebackin10minutes,thinkofme.比尔巴特森我的朋友BillBatson,myman.巴杜奇运气真好Barducci,whatluck.听着1.isten.套套哦对不起伙计Rubbers,ohsorrymyman.你为
14、什么不打个结呢巴特森?Whydontyoutieitinaknot,Batson?我来帮你比利lldoitforyou,Billy.哟试试用纱布包起来Yo,trysomesaranwrap.那样能行?Doesthatwork?啊Ah.好了Allright.啊Ah.医生有心跳Doctor,we,vegotabeat.没用的他的瞳孔扩散了It,snogood,hispupilsareblown.谁去把门关上Somebodyclosethatdoor.你想带他去做手术吗Doyouwanttotakehimdowntosurgery?不已经太迟了No,itsalreadybeentoolong.呃就这样吧他活不过来了Well,thatsit,hesnotgonnacomethrough.我可以连接呼吸器Icanconnecttherespirator.不别管他No,leavehimalone,也许我们会收到移植请求maybewe,llgetatransplantrequest.你的头发看起来棒极了Yourhairlooksterrific.当然-我会尽量通知Suredoes.-lltrytonotify他的家人hisfamily.不用麻烦了他没有Dontbother,hedoesnthaveany.等等他们不能放弃啊Holdit,theycantgive