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1、Leslie-怎么了Ron1.eslie.-Whatsup,Ron?我需要你去趟四楼的机动车管理局mgonnaneedyoutogouptotheBureauofMotorVehiclesonthefourthfloor.我们得说服他们免除公园货车逾期的注册费WegottatalkourselvesoutofthislateregistrationfeefortheParksvan.不要啊我才不想去四楼啊Comeon.Idontwanttogotothefourthfloor.那是地球上最毛骨悚然的地方ThatisthecreepiestplaceonEarth.四楼很可怕Thefourthf
2、loorisawful.车管所离婚登记缓刑工作室恶TheDMV,divorcefilings,probationoffices.Ugh!他们放了个爆米花机缓解气氛Theyputapopcornmachineuptherejusttobrightenthingsup,但他们用错了油buttheyusedthewrongkindofoil,一堆人得去换喉管了andabunchofpeoplehadtogettheirthroatsreplaced.他们只和你或者我聊Theyllonlytalktoyouorme,而我去不了因为我不想去andIcantgo,becauseIdon,twantto.好
3、吧Okay.嘿宝你挺好看啊Hey,boo.Yourepretty.呃谢谢你先生Uh.Thankyou,sir.嘿妹子Hey,girl.你在缓刑期吗Areyouonprobation?我有干净尿液你需要女尿吗我有女的Igotcleanurine.Youneedfemale?Igotfemale.我没事谢谢-嘿你干净吗我也买♥♥mgood,thankyou.-Hey,youclean?Ibuy,too.肃静肃静Order.Order!下个案子印第安纳州公诉Nextcase.Indianavs.我知道我只是跟你说Iknow,mjusttellingyou.离婚法庭Tom和
4、Wendy吗TomandWendy?爆米花要吗Popcorn?公园与游憩公园与游憩公园与游憩第2季第11集第2季第11集所以TomSo,Tom,你的生活怎么样啊howseverythinginyourlife,generally?太棒了冒了个险网上买♥♥了双鞋Amazing.Tookarisk.Boughtsomeshoesonline.如你所见帅气地值了PaidOffhandsomely,asyoucansee.嗯哼Uh-huh.你的那个那个机构呢你作为其中成员的Andhowareyourinstitutions,thatyoureapartof?啊你听说我离婚了
5、Ah.Youheardaboutmydivorce?我看到你出现在四楼了我非常非常抱歉Isawyouonthefourthfloor.mso,sosorry.说实话没事Honestly,itsfine.比艾薇儿和Sum41那个家伙更久对吧1.astedlongerthanAvrilLavigneandtheguyfromSum41,amIright?我不知道这些是啥Tom别假忙了Idontknowwhatthoseare.Look,Tom,stopworking.哇Whoa!要是保存了就好了Wouldhavebeennicetohavesavedthat.你应该自动保存的Youshouldve
6、auto-savedthat.那感觉是你的错Thatkindoffeelslikeyourfault.你看我听到你接她电♥话♥时的声音了1.ook,veheardyourvoicewhenshecallsyouonthephone.我看到她离开时你看着她屁♥股♥的眼神veseenyoulookatherasswhensheleavestheroom.你爱她啊Youloveher.1.eslie你想做的事情我心领了1.eslie,Ireallyappreciatewhatyouretryingtodo,但我没事butmfine.看看我的脸你
7、在看吗1.ook,lookatmyface.Areyouwatching?我做了点小研究Ididalittleresearch,发现离婚是个人生活中压力第二大的事情anddivorceisthenumbertwomoststressfuleventinapersonslife.当然结婚是第七所以要当心了所有人Ofcourse,marriageisnumberseven.So,watchout,everyone.都不是好事Itsallbad.我们得站出来帮助TomWehavetostepup,forTomssake.我觉得Tom看起来没问题啊IthinkTomseemsfine.这就是问题Wel
8、l,thatistheproblem.Tom总是看着像个滑头酷小子TomalwaysseemslikeMr.SlicksterCoolGuy,但他其实会把情绪buthesactuallyhidinghisemotions埋藏在厚厚的男士香水之下underneathaverythicklayerofAxebodyspray.我们必须帮助他我们是他的安全气泡Wehavetohelphim.Wearehissafebubble.她说得没错他的家人都不在这Sheskindofright.Noneofhisfamilyliveshere,他的朋友不是兄弟会就是傻瓜andallofhisfriendsar
9、efratguysandmorons.这好像不关我们的事啊Thisseemslikenoneofourbusiness.支持一下好嘛Besupportive,okay?别表现得像“不我才不想Dontbeall,like,No,Idontwantto.“我是个男的我喜欢玩火打曲棍球和吃肉IamaguyandIlikefireandplayinghockeyandeatingmeat!“不不我说No,no,saysI!这个Ron模仿得真像ThatwasareallygoodRon.谢谢Thankyou.我不知道怎么解释.Idontknowhowtoexplain.嘿MarkHey,Mark.擦鞋摊
10、还是没有你一直问的梅毒药Theshoeshinestandstilldoesnthavethatsyphilismedicationyouwereaskingabout.Ann嘿真巧啊Ann,hey!Whatacoincidence!你来这个办公室完全是执行公事吗Areyouinthisofficepurelyforbusinessreasons?执行私事实际上我男朋友Mark在这上班Pleasure,actually.MyboyfriendMarkworkshere.他就坐在我旁边He,ssittingrightnexttome.嘿AndyHey,Andy.很惊讶能见到你啊一整天每一天每一个
11、我们在的地方Whatasurprise,runningintoyouallday,everyday,everysingleplacethatweare.我也是那我们回见1.ikewise.WelLIguessllseeyouguysaround.再见啊Seeyou.哦呃还有Mark再说一次Oh!Uh,also,Mark,again,我们没有你预定的那种特小号♥安全套Wedon,thavethoseextra-smallcondomsyouordered.我打电♥话♥给工厂了需要特别定制Icalledthefactory,itsgonnatakeaspe
12、cialorder.不光是因为大小还有奇怪形状的原因Notjustbecauseofthesize,butbecauseoftheweirdshapeaswell.他们之前没处理过我们回聊Somethingtheyveneverdealtwithbefore.Welltalk.Mark从没找我问过小号♥奇形怪状的安全套Markneveraskedmeforanysmall,weirdly-shapedcondoms.我编的Imadethatup.每一天我巧妙地损害他们的感情Everyday,Isubtlychipawayattheirrelationship.一点一点地破坏Wea
13、keningit,littlebylittle.TomHaverford在哪呢WheresTomHaverford?我的阎王啊For*sake.*所以你离婚了当然了必须了*So,youhadadivorce,ofcourse,ofcourse*没人能享受离婚的必须了*Andnooneenjoysadivorce,ofcourse我不知道怎么做啊1dontknowwhattodo,man.我不能说嘿LeSlie是绿卡婚姻啦我好得很”Icantbelike,Hey,Leslie,it,sagreencardmarriage,mfine.你知道Leslie觉得你是只受伤的动物Youknow,Lesl
14、iejustthinksyoureawoundedanimal,所以她的母性本能开始运作了这是你要做的soherfemaleinstinctsarekickingin.Hereswhatyoudo.表现悲伤让她拔掉你爪子上的刺Actsad,letherpullthethornoutofyourpaw给你包扎伤口andwrapabandagearoundit.这样她就安心了她就不会折腾你了Thatllmakeherfeelbetter.Shellgetoffyourjock.你还是不能告诉任何人绿卡的事Youstillcanttellanyoneaboutthegreencardthing.显然
15、离婚之后还是会碰上麻烦的Apparentlyyoucangetintroubleevenafteradivorce.该死没事嘿我会保守你的秘密的Damntheman.Well,hey,yoursecretssafewithme.CondoleezzaRice美国国务卿谢RondoleezzaRiceThanks,RondoleezzaRice.好的各位谣言为真Wendy和我要分开了Okay,everyone.Therumorsaretrue.WendyandIaresplittingup.是我很伤心Yeah,mreallyhurt.致以深切同情我的朋友msosorryyoufeelthatway,litt